From Fear to Freedom: How God Redeemed My Story Through Math
I’ve never really shared my story before. One of the main reasons I became a middle school teacher is because middle school was one of the darkest times of my life.
It was paradoxical - in 6th grade, I wasn’t even ranked in math competitions. Yet by 8th grade, I had become the #1 ranked student in my county and state. On the outside, it looked like success. But what people didn’t see was the deep pain I carried inside. During those years, I often studied alone in the back room of my parents’ business, battling thoughts of hopelessness and even suicide. A quiet lie would echo in my mind: “The only purpose of your life is to study, to win math competitions, and to achieve perfect grades.” I felt so empty inside.
May 2011: Hawaii Governor, Neil Abercrombie presenting the 1st Place Hawaii State AMC8 award
May 2014: Honolulu Mayor, Kirk Caldwell presenting the 1st Place Hawaii State Math Bowl Award
Because of that, when I entered high school, I tried to distance myself from math. To me, math had become associated with anxiety, fear, and endless competition. I threw myself instead into public speaking and volunteering, hoping to find a new sense of purpose. But the truth is that I continued to carry that fear of math all the way through high school and even into Stanford University.
Everything changed in spring 2018, when I hit rock bottom in depression. In that dark place, I had a personal revelation in my heart, not just in my mind that God has a UNIQUE plan and purpose for my life. My mistakes and past failures do not define me or disqualify me from fulfilling it. The Bible says, “The gifts and calling of God are irrevocable.” (Romans 11:29) I no longer needed to compare myself to others. I just needed to be the best Jasmine God created me to be, using the gifts, talents, and experiences He had given me. God wasn’t expecting me to be the best mathematician in the world or the top businesswoman in the Bay Area, but simply to be thankful and faithful with what He had entrusted to me. I have made mistakes, but the Bible gives me HOPE that there is NOTHING God cannot redeem. He does miracles bringing beauty from ashes.
And that’s exactly what God is doing in my life now. I used to think the thousands of hours I spent studying for math competitions were a waste-that they were only useful for getting into Stanford. But now I see that God was shaping me all along. Today, I can solve word problems almost effortlessly, sometimes even while watching TV! But more importantly, I’ve discovered joy and purpose in using those very skills to serve others.
Through Doan Math Academy, I teach students everything I learned myself-the same strategies, patterns, and ways of thinking that helped me master difficult topics like Algebra 1, AMC 8, and SAT Math. But beyond formulas and problem-solving tricks, I get to share something far greater: the truth that their lives have purpose in God.
Teaching children about their identity as a royal prince and princess of God
Teaching youth about friendship with God
What once brought me fear has become the very thing God uses to bring others hope. My prayer is that every student who comes to Doan Math Academy leaves not only stronger in math, but stronger in faith and confidence.
If math once made you feel small, anxious, or unworthy, I want you to know that you’re not alone. Your mind is capable, your life has purpose, and your story is still being written by God.
